I can finally see how much I DO have to offer to a partner and look so very forward to a mutually satisfying relationship. I am single, yet learning about how to be comfortable in my own skin so when I am confident enough to venture back out into the dating world, I will attract someone who is seeing the real me and not some type of illusion I'm trying to hide behind.Rob and I will go out on our 4th date tonight :) Peace y'all, Denise What a lovely story, Denise! Congrats on reaching your true self and braving the dating world with comfortable success.In a nutshell, in TA scripts are different than you've got them -- they result from longterm persistent low level programming by the parent of the opposite sex. (This model goes back to before the disintegration of the two-parent family began.) So a mother will tend to script a son to be like his maternal grandfather, possibly emphasizing his good qualities and excising his bad ones, depending on the mother's relationship with her father and her adult perspective.This is quite different from "role model" concepts of early development which emphasize the same-sex parent. One implication for men is that they should choose woman as mothers whose father they like, because their sons are going to resemble him in a lot of ways.
Meeting someone new from such an authentic place within myself was the best decision I could possibly have made. I wanted to connect with someone genuinely and truly and that's exactly what happened.
With that in mind, opening up and getting to know someone does take a certain amount of patience.
Assess each new partner as an individual, and stay keenly connected with how you experience yourself while in his or her presence.
I can totally relate to how you used to approach dating, feeling like you only have your appearance to offer. Your comment has really made me think about my self-worth and how I interact with men... The reality is, both genders are addicted to scripts that were forged from early life history experiences.
We all mimic our formative life experiences when interacting with others, until we realize that using those experiences as a non-negotiable roadmap for life must eventually give way to a more adaptive and reactive style of engagement.